Marriage Counseling After Infidelity: Part 2
“Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater” Is NOT True
There are dozens of reasons why a person may choose to cheat in a relationship. This does not make that person a serial cheater, doomed to constantly repeat his or her bad decisions. Many couples choose not to seek out marriage counseling because they instantly give up on the relationship after infidelity. Doing so could be throwing away years of commitment and good memories the two of you have shared.
With proper marriage counseling and therapy, you can significantly decrease your chances of going through this experience again in the future. Once you have identified the reason why one or both of you cheated in the relationship, you can commit to a plan to correct the problems for good.
Learning To Forgive What You Cannot Forget
You will never be able to forget the fact that your spouse cheated on you, much like the cheating spouse will never forget what he or she did. Rather than trying to erase the memory of the situation altogether, you must learn to move forward and avoid the same mistakes in the future. This is a multi-step process that includes apology, forgiveness, and commitment from both parties.
If you are not the person who cheated in the relationship, it is easy to get stuck on feelings of hurt, betrayal, sadness, and anger, but dwelling on those emotions will never let you heal. Your marriage counselor will work with you through the grieving process so you can truly forgive your spouse for what happened. Otherwise, you will end up in a cycle of constant bitterness that could end your marriage altogether.
Forming A New Bond With Your Spouse
Surprisingly enough, many couples are able to get closer than ever with the help of marriage counseling after infidelity. Not only will you learn how to get through this difficult time in your relationship, but you will also work through other problems that may have led one spouse to cheat in the first place. Once you can both come to terms with what has happened, you can work with one another to start your life anew. Rekindle the romance, reignite the passion, and remember why you got together in the first place. Chances are, your spouse has been missing that connection just as much as you have.