Marriage is tough, no matter how solid of a couple you may be. People who have been together for 50 years find themselves in divorce court because they just can’t get past their differences. If you are debating whether or not to get a divorce, one big question might be on your mind: “Is my marriage worth saving?” We hope that the answer is yes, but you are the only one who can fully determine that. Here is some advice to help you out.
Do You Have Big Fights Or Small, Insignificant Ones?
Every time you have a fight in a marriage, you have to put matters into perspective. Is it really worth throwing away years of commitment over an argument about who was supposed to do the dishes? Think about the types of arguments you have with your spouse and see how significant they really are. You may just be getting annoyed with one another and need to take some time apart for a day or two. Something as simple as a weekend vacation might be all you need to get back on the same page.
Can You Fix The Core Problems?
If there are major problems in your marriage, you have to determine how difficult it will be to fix those problems. One of the biggest issues we see is with infidelity. Some spouses can get past that if they know that their partner will change, and others can no longer see their spouse in the same light. If you can forgive your spouse for the major issues in your relationship, you might be able to work together to get back on good terms. Otherwise, you will have to decide if the pain is just too much to handle anymore.
Do You Still Love Your Spouse?
This is perhaps the most important question of all. It might not be easy to think about falling out of love with your spouse, but people do it more often than you might think. As we grow into new people, we each form a path that we want to take. If your path no longer converges with your spouse’s path, you may find yourself drifting away. There are ways that a marriage counselor can help you get back on the same track again, but only if you are both willing to make that commitment. Decide if your marriage is worth saving, and then do whatever it takes to keep it strong.